The Time is Near

If somebody asked the question "What is your dream?" what would you say? Most men would say to be a professional athlete. Well, we all know that dream come true is very few and far between. For my husband his dream since he began school, was to be a doctor of nurse anesthesia, and beginning on August 20, he will be living his dream as he begins his last 3 years of medical school. Up to this point he has been able to work and go to school, so we have always been together. However, these last 3 years he will have to move 3 hours away and be away from us.

When we first found out where he was going to be placed, I cried for a week. Literally, every night for a week, I cried or more like sobbed myself to sleep. Of course, this upset him and he told me that if I didn't want him to go that he wouldn't. I couldn't tell him that, because I do want him to go. It is his dream, but  I just keep thinking to myself, how am I going to make it on those days when I can't get out of bed or I don't feel good? Who is going to take care of Lizzie when I am sick?

Josh has been with me since I was diagnosedl in early of 2004 that I had lupus. He was there when I threw up everyday because they didn't know what was wrong with me. He has seen me at my best and at my worst. He loved me and held my hand when we were at the fetal specialist when we were trying to get pregnant and heard the doctor tell me all the risks I would be taking in the event that I did get pregnant (that story is another day, another post), and he loved me anyway.

To think that I am going to have to go three years of being a "single mother" with lupus terrifies me.
Now granted, my parents do live near me and will be able to help, but I don't think they truly understand the extent of the disease. I have not lived with them since being diagnosed with the exception of one summer. I know they will help me, but not like Josh. He knows exactly what to do, and never questions if I am really sick. He just knows.

This weekend we are driving to where he will be attending school, which is about 3 hours away, and looking for him an apartment. This is really happening.....he is really going.... and while I am excited for him, I am terrified about what lies ahead. With lupus you never know.

Please pray that I stay healthy enough to be able to continue to work for the three years he is in school. Pray that I am able to take care of myself and Lizzie and provide for her while her daddy is gone.

I will persevere. I will win, and my husband will have his dream come true!!!

Happy Thursday lupies!!! Have a happy lupie day!!!

~Tiffany~

                                                        

                

I love this man!!!!!

OOTD

Top: Kiki La Rue

Jeans: Wal-Mart

Shoes: Mossimo (bought off of Poshmark for $6)

Necklace: Tiffany & Co.